- The way I see it:
There is mind blowing Ted Talk by Johann Hari, “Everything you think you know about addiction is wrong”, that if you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it, specially if you are willing to understand the deep root of addictions. In this article, "You Can Never Change Your Life Through Willpower. Here’s What Actually Works, The opposite of addiction is connection", Benjamin p. Hardy, also highlights the relationship between addiction and disconnection. But not only that, he goes one step further by stating that willpower doesn’t actually work. Because will power it’s focussed on the self, and addiction is all about context. So is all behavior. Some inspiring points below of his magnificent article.
The opposite of addiction is connection.
Addiction expert and founder of Genius Recovery, Joe Polish, often says, “A person is as sick as their secrets.”
Trauma isn’t necessarily caused by tough experiences. It’s caused by keeping those experiences and the pain or confusion of those experiences to yourself. It’s caused by fighting silent battles. It’s caused by trying to go at it alone.
Addiction therapist and researcher, Arnold M. Washton, Ph.D. said, “Many people think that what the addict needs is willpower, but nothing could be further from the truth.”
Addiction is all about context. So is all behavior.
We All Have Multiple Personalities.
According to neuroscientist, Candace Pert, PhD, in her book, YOUR BODY IS YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS MIND, we all have multiple personalities. Bessel van der Kolk M.D. agrees, explaining that certain sides of us are very well-developed, whereas other sides are radically under-developed.
Something may trigger you and all-of-a-sudden the scared 3-year-old version of you shows up. You don’t know how to cope, and you do anything you can to avoid the pain and confusion you’re experiencing. Addiction, then, is a solution to a problem. It’s a solution, albeit an unhealthy and temporary solution, to pain.
When a person gets stuck in their pain and individuality, Bessel van der Kolk M.D. calls it having a “frozen personality.” Which brings up another huge myth and misconception in Western Culture: the idea that we have a fixed and static personality — one we’re born with and one we die with.
Connection is the key to growth.
Connection is the key to overcoming addiction.
Connection is required for going much further than you could ever go on your own.
- Medium, by Benjamin P. Hardy,